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Law books I've never read? Check.
Realizing for the first time that my Corporations book is brown instead of blue? Check. (Note: This stunning revelation came when I realized I haven't seen the book since the beginning of the semester and wasted an hour looking for a blue book only to discover a brown one.)
Notes I failed to take? Check.
Blogging when I should have been paying attention? Check.
Showing up at the exam and realizing you don't know what your professor's name even is? Check.
Yes, it is that time of the semester in which I realize "Oh, shizzle, maybe if I'd actually done some work all semester I wouldn't have to work so damn hard the next few weeks during finals."
Eh. But that would have involved work. All semester. ALL SEMESTER. And frankly, at this point in my single parenthood/law student career, "all semester" sounds like a LOOOOOOONG time.
Whatever, as long as I pass, right?
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Also, I wanted to let you all know I found out what happened with Mommy and Me Music Class. Remember how a few weekends back I showed up for class with my 30 lbs. infant tucked on my left hip only to discover the door was locked and nobody was there? Well, it seems as though the company had called and left a message on my home phone (who actually USES their home phone, anyway?) to tell me it was cancelled for low enrollment. The whole season of class! Seems as though people have better things to do than entertain Sumo Baby and me at music class! Bastards. How dare they have lives!
This is all Yoga Mom's fault. You see, I think she decided to punish me for my sodium-eating Chipotle-eating ways. I bet there IS a Mommy and Me Music Class, but that she decided to exclude me and so the class meets at a secret location and Sumo and I just aren't invited. They all hang out in yoga pants, eat no-sugar low-calorie reduced-fat yogurt, and obsessively burn off every calorie consumed on treadmills while talking about how wonderful and advanced their babies are. They do this while one says, "I'm SO FAT!" And another says, "No way; you're TOTALLY thin. I'M SO FAT!" And the circle continues. And then they all decide that their children will never consume saturated fat and that if they go to birthday parties, their kids will bring a separate baggie with a "healthy snack" and that they won't be allowed to consume the birthday cake like peons. Sumo will not invite any of them to his birthday parties in which much saturated fat and merriment will ensue.
Anyway, I'm back to the drawing board - I have to try to find another class. My search for sanity (or, more probable, insanity) continues! Oh, and DAMN YOU, YOGA MOM!
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One more random thought. I see that my T&A photos on my last post failed to attract more readers, so I'm going to go for some Sumo photos. Notice the shirt. How awesome is it?
And here are more unrelated pictures from Sumo's trip down south. I am including them because 1) this post can't get more random, and 2) it's cute. By the way, while he can't pull himself up yet (he's too heavy), I helped Sumo stand up and he was able to hold on to the coffee table and stand all by himself for maybe 30 seconds before he wiped out. I was happy and sad all at the same time - my baby's growing up!
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PS - I still have no AC. Target was sold out of portables (great tip, readers!) and even the portables require use of windows, anyway . . . and I can't clog up my windows with portables if I'm putting my house on the market. So . . . I decided if it gets too hot Sumo and I are moving to the local hotel. Depending on how pugilistic I'm feeling, I may submit the bill to el presidente. I've also decided it would be fun to leave one dirty diaper a day outside of el presidente's door to give him a whiff of what I'm smelling down here in my unairconditioned pad. *sigh*
36 comments:
Working all semester is greatly overrated. I'd totally cram it all in the last few weeks if I were you.
Sumo is just too damn cute. You knew that, though.
So So cute. What an adorable baby. I read your blog! Dont stop. I know how you feel. I have a blog but no one was reading it so I lost interest in writing it. Plus I was super busy...maybe I will post something today. You are funny and I like it keep it up!
Oh my Sumo is a doll baby. Way too cute.
I feel your pain with school ... I always wanted to be a lawyer but there is no way I could put up with the classes.
And I hate Yoga Mom Types. Hate 'em!
I will be thinking of you at music class with The Babe tomorrow! I love your dirty diaper idea...but how can anything foul smelling come out of that baby? He is too cute!
The really depressing part is when you get to bar review and you realize that all you ever needed to learn about EVERY subject can be learned in 6 freaking weeks.
Sorry, that's probably not helpful right now.
Study hard!
I love your baby! I do! That cute little Big Kahuna........oh he melts me!
Good luck with the cramming! Einstein's a last-minute-worker/studier. He does some of his best work under the gun though!
Good luck!
I too am studying hard right now. After high intake of alcohol consumptions this weekend I believe I am finally sober enough to study. I wish you luck in your adventures!
And- Sumo. I would kiss him all of the time. Please tell me you do. He is a very handsome boy! And I love how his shirt says "Big Kahunna" hahaha.
The "Big Kahuna" shirt is GREAT!!!
P.S. I was the work all semester type. But to redeem myself let me just say, I'd never wear yoga pants.
The look on his face says "look out girls...pretty soon I'm going to be walking and then I'm coming to getcha!" He's a lady's man.
Do you have a Jumbo Home Improvement Warehouse in your area? Either Blue or Orange? They sell (more expensive, but TOTALLY worth it) portable non-window air conditioners. Some are like "swamp" coolers that require water, but when you're hot and baby is crying and everybody is stinky, you don't really care what the hell makes it cool. I found a ton of them online... and they're expensive, but less expensive than staying at a hotel during May and June!
OH WAIT... Yoga Mom did this! She's conspired to SWEAT YOUR ASS OFF in the next 2 months. She figures if you're gonna eat crappy food, you might as well live in a sauna and sweat out some of that fat and sodium. Yep. Damn you yoga mom!!!
I used to always cram at the end of the semester. Seriously all the cool kids do it.
Oh and I would dothe dirty diaper. Make sure he eats peas or something to make it funky.
OMG I could just eat up his cute little leg rolls! Love them.
And I've done that whole "Wow, that book is really brown?" and spent the afternoon looking for a completely different color book/item. Too funny!
I can totally understand what happened with the book--the other day I needed a book from the library that I could have sworn was light gray. It turned out to be dark green.
Oh what a Cutie he is, I see a heart breaker in the making. I am with you, I would find out where el presidente lives and take the whole damn diaper pale and place it at his door, better yet find a way to affix the diapers to the door so when he swings it open to the smell will quite literally hit him in the face! :) Yes I am evil and I know it. Good Luck with finals!
I was also just going to suggest a "swamp" AC: they don't use windows and they work pretty well. Thanks to Hyphen mama for being far more eloquent that I could ever be--I'm from Montana, so I know little about AC :)
those photos ARE so cute! I can't wait to put my baby in the cute outfits that people are giving me.
Every semester, I say that I will get ahead and that each saturday I will put the new stuff we covered in class into an outline. But laziness and apathy always ends up overriding all that beginning semester motivation. I'm in the same boat as you!
those pics are very cute!
And you are better off not being involved in a group run by the yoga mom, if she actually had her own
What brought me to your site? That avatar picture! That's the best one I've ever seen.
He's so cute and that pic is just great.
I was always a last minute crammer, too. Why suffer all semester when you can pack the misery into a couple of weeks?
Uh oh - I've got my yoga pants on!!! he he he I am not the type that you mention though - NOT at all.
Your baby is seriously one of the cutest I have ever seen. He is gorgeous.
Keep cool. =)
OMG, is it just me or does he get cuter? I remember the last finals I took, for my online stuff, we'd done all our work online(books everything) than we get to about 2 weeks before finals and the teacher was all 'oh by the way you need XYZ book' that they happened to be all sold out of.
So I got some (mildly) embarassing photos up on my blog should give you a laugh!
I LOL at the thought of the class taking place in a secret location!
I don't know why you bother w/ the whole law school thing. I've been ordering around lawyers all a.m. and having a blast!
I think they just humor me out of pity.
You know if you had twitter I could have saved myself some time. The reason my prom date, had to get permission to go was because he wasn't a student at my high school, and had never been a student there. I think I may dig out the box of shame from my Homecoming or Tolo(I can't remember which) that was just horrid. *shudders*
Good LORD. Your child's head is HUGE. Heh. He's a cutie.
Definitely be leaving the diapers at the door. Maybe in a vent just as it enters his condo. Let him find it.
So I'm totally having an "AHA" moment. Duh! What a great idea -- putting the antibiotic in the baby food. I'm glad you suggested bananas. It's the only baby food she will eat.
Also I'm all for the cramming b/c you see, I'm such the procrastinator!
And lastly, I adored the pics of your precious Sumo baby. He is absolutely adorable. Really. He is, though I'm telling you what you already know:)
Your thoughts on the semester is how I felt about calculus in college, there was no way someone who couldn't speak english was going to teach me, someone who hates math a whole lot. I made my ubermathsmart roomie to get me crash course on how to do 2 problems the morning of the final exam.
Love the big kahuna shirt. It's perfect. the pants are cute too.
I turned in my last paper for the semester just minutes ago. Re: yoga moms, they really bug me. My friend was complaining the other day about the 10 pounds she has put on in the last year. Now, I have been carrying around a sumo baby load for a bee-hind since I went back to school. My friend had the nerve to join weight watchers for her measly little 10 pounds. I had to walk away before there was a smack down.
I found your blog thanks to Burg Baby's Mom and I'm so glad. You're going right onto my list o' faves.
Sumo's adorable!
Totally know this time of the semester. Sucks.
I love el presidente's pay back. He won't even know what hit 'im (until he smells it from a football field away that is!!).
love the swirly hair in the front of Sumo's head! So I'm going to be obnoxious like all the old ladies at the grocery store were to me with my red-head...so where'd he get the red hair?
also, that one pic, the Big Kahuna is all "duuuuude!" all he's missing is that hang-10 or hang-loose or whatever that crazy surfer hand gesture is.
(and we have those same Robeez!)
Cracking up over the diaper comment.
Sumo baby is in a commercial I saw years ago. I swear he is the perfect sweet cute little guy.
Just an idea, study hard, study hard all semester, it really does not matter what the professors name is as long as you take the right exam, the name is not a required answer on the exam. If all else fails memorize one line, "you want fries with that?"
No AC, I'd do something desperate.
DG
Look at those chubby legs! I wanna bite 'em!
LOL!! You totally just wrote my exam-time post. Took the words right out of my mouth.
He's not only sumo baby, he's SUMO cute!! What does that mean? I don't know. Those cheeks are to die for! And the Kahuna shirt toally rocks!
I know you posted this forever ago but the corporations thing made me laugh. I could never find mine because I'd look for a corporations book when the damn thing was titled bus. orgs. It was lost for a long time.
Still having fun reading...
(a) he's going to grow up tall and thin and he's already gorgeous and will not appreciate the Suma ref, well, maybe he will
(b) you're going to get hate mail if you diss the health food people on the internet. you can only whisper these things
(c) knock em dead this week, if you haven't finished finals, I mean
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